Fun Stuff, Joke, Adult Joke, Funny Quote, Funny One Liner, Humor, Humor Story, Humor Quote

A couple has a male friend visiting from out-of-state, when an unexpected blizzard blows in, and keeps him from traveling. Since the couple has no guest room, he states his intention to find a nearby hotel, and be on his way in the morning.

"Nonsense," says the wife. "Our bed is plenty big enough for all three of us, and we're all friends here."

The husband concurs, and before long they're settled in: Husband in the middle, wife on his left, friend on his right.

After a while, the husband begins snoring, and the wife sneaks over to the friend's side of the bed, and invites him to have sex with her. Naturally, he'd like to, but he's reluctant.

"We're in the same bed with your husband! He'll wake up, and he'll kill me."

"Don't worry about him," she says, "he's such a sound sleeper, he'll never notice. If you don't believe me, just yank a hair out of his ass. He won't even wake up."

So the friend does so, and sure enough, she's right. Her husband sleeps right through having a hair yanked out of his ass. So, she and the friend have sex, and then she goes back to her side of
the bed.

After about twenty minutes, though, she's back on his side of the bed, asking him to do it again. The same argument follows, another hair is yanked from the husband's ass, and again they
have sex.

This keeps up for about half the night, until after about the sixth time, when the wife goes back to her side. The husband rolls over, and whispers to his friend,

"Listen, I don't care if you screw my wife, but could you please quit using my ass for a scoreboard?"

This guy was deer hunting in North Carolina. He shoots a deer, and as he is dragging it back to his truck, he gets stopped by this redneck game warden who asks to see his hunting license. The
hunter shows him the license, and is about to leave, when the game warden says,

"Not so fast, boy. I need to inspect the deer."

The game warden reaches down, sticks his finger up the deer's butt, pulls it out then sniffs his finger. The game warden gets angry and says,

"Wait a minute boy! This here ain't no North Carolina deer. This here is a Virginia deer! You need to have a Virginia Hunting License to hunt this deer. You got a Virginia Hunting License on you boy?"

Well, it just so happens that the guy had been hunting in Virginia the week before. He goes back into his wallet and pulls out a Virginia Hunting License. The game warden looks at the
valid license and says disappointedly,

"Well.... OK, I guess I'll have to let you go. I really do enjoy writing up boys like you who hunt deer without a license, but you look like you got everything in order. So go on, get out of here."

The following week, the guy is hunting again. He shoots another deer and as he is dragging it back to his truck, he gets stopped by the same game warden who says,

"Just a minute boy. I need to inspect the deer." He reaches down, sticks his finger up the deer's butt, pulls it out, sniffs his finger and says,

"Boy! This here is a South Carolina deer! You got a South Carolina Hunting License?"

The hunter, somewhat surprised, said that he had one in the truck. He goes and gets it out of the glove box, shows it to the game warden, who again has to let him go.

So this goes on for the next three weeks. Each week the hunter shoots a deer; one each from Georgia, Tennessee, and West Virginia. Each time the game warden stops to do the finger test,
and each time the hunter is able to produce the correct license. Finally, after the West Virginia deer, the Game Warden is furious.

"Boy! You got a hunting license from every state in the South! Where the Hell you from anyway?"

The hunter drops his pants, bends over, and says, "You tell me!"

Bubba died in a fire and was burnt pretty bad & the morgue needed someone to identify the body. So his two best friends, Daryl & Gomer, were sent for.

Daryl went in and the mortician pulled back the sheet. Daryl said,

"Yup, he's burnt pretty bad. Roll him over."

So the mortician rolled him over and Daryl looked and said,

"Nope, ain't Bubba."

The mortician thought that was rather strange. Then he brought Gomer in to identify the body. Gomer took a look at him and said,

"Yup, he's burnt real bad, roll him over."

The mortician rolled him over and Gomer looked down and said,

"No, it ain't Bubba."

The mortician asked, "How can you tell?" Gomer said,

"Well, Bubba had two assholes."

"What? He had two assholes?" said the mortician.

"Yup, everyone in town knew he had two assholes.

Every time we went to town, folks would say,

"Here comes Bubba with two assholes".